Do you want to have a strong marriage relationship? I guess that is what you want because every woman desires it. A strong marriage relationship does not happen by accident, it is built; and it takes effort and commitment to build it. But the question is how is it built? Building a strong marriage relationship can be compared with the parable of Jesus about the wise and foolish builders. It says,
“Whoever comes to me, and hears my sayings and does them, I will show you whom he is like: He is like a man building a house, who dug deep and laid the foundation on the rock. And when the flood arose, the stream beat vehemently against that house, and could not shake it, for it was founded on the rock. But he who heard and did nothing is like a man who built a house on the earth without a foundation, against which the stream beat vehemently; and immediately it fell. And the ruin of that house was great.” Luke 6:49-50
The scripture also says, “The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish pulls it down with her hands”. Prov.14:1
I guess you know that the Bible is not saying the woman is a builder of a physical structure, but that she is a builder of a marriage relationship.
Your marriage needs a solid foundation
In Jesus’s parable, it is the foundation that makes the difference between the two houses. The man that built on the rock, dug deep, and laid the foundation on the rock. But the foolish didn’t want to go through the pain of digging, so built his own house without a foundation. The two houses both stood, and were looking fine, but when the waters came heavily, that was when the difference showed.
In like manner, every marriage relationship seems peaceful and lovely, until when things begin to go wrong before you know a strong marriage relationship. A married relationship that exists without a solid foundation cannot stand the test of time. When we depend on our own wisdom as a basis for building our homes we are not different from the man who built his house on the ground without a solid foundation. The house could not stand the storm, it fell. In the same way, a marriage relationship that is dependent on human wisdom cannot survive in the time of crises.
It is never too late to have your dreamed marriage
How are you building your own home sister, is it laid on the foundation of God’s wisdom or are you relying on your own wisdom? Perhaps you are stuck in your relationship already, and you are counting on your husband to change so that the journey would continue smoothly. Maybe you have waited without any positive results, and now you lack what to do. Perhaps you are almost giving up thinking nothing will work again. And you may be thinking “let’s just stay together with each minding his business”. But deep down you are worried because you know that is not what you bargained for.
Some of us also thought we had all it takes to make a marriage relationship work, but after several attempts, we failed. When we turned back to God (the chief architect) He revealed the secret to us, and when we applied it worked. That is why I want to share it with you in this post.
Your marriage is worth sacrificing for
As a matter of fact, if you put your mind on the mistakes of your husband building a strong marriage relationship may not be possible. You may have to shift your expectations from your husband to God. The truth is your husband also sees your own mistakes and he might be waiting for you to change as well. When you fail he may choose to find his happiness elsewhere, and that is not what you want.
Now, the only alternative is for you to make the sacrifice; which would be beneficial for both of you. I know it is not easy to overlook a wrong done to you, that is why you must turn to Jesus. How? You may ask, you need a change in the way you think, and it is only him that can do that for you.
There is a need for a change of mindset
The scripture says, “The heart is deceitful above all things; and desperately wicked, who can know it”? Jer.17:9; “There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death” Prov.14:12. According to these scriptures, our thinking is evil, and we cannot make any good decisions without the guidance of God. So we must request the Lord Jesus to guide and direct our minds. Only Christ can help us make the right decisions. We must allow him to do a clean-up in our hearts by throwing off the garbage from our hearts and replacing them with godly virtues.
That is what you need my sister, sincerely from your heart tell Jesus to cleanse you from all unrighteousness and fill you with His Spirit. Don’t depend on your own judgment but allow Jesus to have His way in your life.
The scripture states that
“ For to be carnally minded is death, but to be spiritually minded is life and peace. Because the carnal mind is enmity against God; for it is not subject to the law of God, nor indeed be. So then, those who are in the flesh cannot please God”. Rom.8:6-8.
It clearly shows that when we depend on our own thinking and make decisions regarding our marriage relationships we would fail; we can only succeed when we are controlled by the Holy Spirit.
The Great Challenge
The problem we are having is, we are scared of giving Jesus our all, lest we lose our freedom of doing what our minds tell us to do. But our own reasoning is limited and selfish in nature. Depending on it does produce the good we want.
That is why you need Jesus to help you. With his help, you can focus on how to make changes in your conduct toward your husband. Taking a deliberate step to accept him as he is, love him as he is, and submit to him as he is.
By the time you take that step, it may not be easy, but as I said earlier it is a sacrifice. Anytime a contrary opinion arises, tell yourself, it is a sacrifice.
The result is huge
As you get carried away doing that with a sincere heart, your husband is observing, and God is also working in his heart. Any little sacrifice you make, God calls the attention of your husband to it, and he appreciates it. Bit by bit, he gets attracted to you and wouldn’t like to offend you. Before you know it, you have a brand new husband. Most of the things you were waiting for him to change would be changed without you noticing it.
Don’t you think it Worths the sacrifice? Surely, it does, yes, it truly does.